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To the Victor, Go the Spoiled

I got up at five this morning and logged on, looking for the latest US Presidential Election results. The first thought that crossed my mind when it became clear that Obama was streets ahead of McCain was that the soil on quite a few graves across the USA, must be looking disturbed, as though…

Anyway, this is not about the dead; this is about the living, learning, citizens of the United States of America that have put personal fears and doubts aside, to elect their first Black American President. Historians could not be denied their chance to write a bold new page in the history books. People of America, take a bow, you have made the world proud. The undoing of the great harm perpetrated on your country by the Bush administration, can now begin in earnest. I am sure the world waits eagerly to walk with you on the tough road that lies ahead.

And so to President Obama I say, savour your victory for now; a great nation spoiled by the excesses of the previous administration awaits your urgent attention. I wish you well on the hard work that lies ahead, to return your country to its former glory.

The ANC Is In A "League" of Their Own

The African National Congress (ANC) under the leadership of Nelson Mandela scaled great heights in the 90's to transform from a liberation movement into a fully-fledged political party, founded on sound ethical principles. In recent times, however this once great force for political change, has fallen on hard times, bedevilled by corruption, incompetence, immorality, unethical behaviour by senior members, the resignation and break-away of senior party members, and a disturbing leaning toward dictatorial rule.

Some, if not all of these unhealthy qualities are no more evident than in the organization's Youth and Women's wings; the ANC Youth League and the ANC Women's League respectively. Freshly elected Youth League leader, Julius Malema and Women's League leader, Angie Motshekga both started off their "reign" of ignominy within their respective areas, with a strange case of foot-and-mouth disease. Their public rantings ranged from mildly
amusing, to the bizarre.

Malema's famous "kill for Zuma" speech got him into a lot of bother; and then he went on to repeat the same nonsense, cloaked in different terms, even after public and organizational censure. And if that was not enough to label him a lunatic, he went on to lead the charge for President Mbeki's dismissal from public office. A little while ago, Motshekga on the other hand broke out into a serious sweat over several senior ANC members who were planning to form a break-away political party, labelling them as "dogs" who were "sick in the head." More recently though, she has been quoted as publicly stating that education is not important (while being in the position of MEC for Education in Gauteng Province), when it was revealed that Malema had really rotten matric exam results (of which one was a G symbol in Woodwork and another, an H symbol in Maths, both on the standard grade). And to top that, in a recent interview she declared that it was in the interests of democracy to have a one party state.

It's bad enough when public figures mouth off with no regard for decency and the harm their ill-considered remarks causes, but it's downright despicable when they try to back-track and deny meaning what they said; even blatantly refusing to apologise. When you look and listen to these two representatives of the ANC as it exists today, it's not hard to imagine the makings of a tyranny in the works.

Who Will It Be, Obama or McCain?

The culmination of a long, and what is arguably the most interesting Presidential election campaign in recent times, is at hand. On 4th November, 2008, Americans go to the polls and the world waits with baited breath...

Will Americans write a bold new chapter in the history of the United States of America by returning Obama to the White House, or will narrow-minded conservatism triumph once again? Come November, 04, will America have its first non-white President or will the White House remain aptly named?

We, the people of the world wait to celebrate with you, America. Please do not disappoint us.

The Sharks Have Done It!!!

Yesss, finally. It's been a loooong wait. And it feels soooo good.

Curry Cup 2008 Final: Sharks 14, Bulls 9. Well done boys.

Sharks forever!!!

Curse All Automated Telephone Answering Systems

Last Friday, my broadband connection suddenly stopped working. Since I was out partying the whole weekend, I did not get a chance to report the problem to my service provider. When I did eventually try on Monday afternoon, I became embroiled in a battle of raw perseverance with my service provider who shall remain nameless.

After following the voice prompt process of keying in what seemed like interminable choices, I waited on the line for about 25 minutes, listening to crappy music interspersed with some guy with the most irritating voice droning “You are currently holding for a (name of service provider) Broadband Consultant, please stay on the line; we will be with you shortly,” and then gave up. After trying to re-configure my router and a few other things, I decided to call it quits for the night.

I tried again on Tuesday night, this time determined to outlast that droning voice and the boring music. I settled into a more or less comfortable position, with the receiver cradled between my left ear (for some reason, I tend to hear better with my left ear) and my shoulder, and I started to read Christopher Hitchens’ book “The Portable Atheist.” After an hour and twenty minutes of bad music and “You are currently holding for a (name of service provider) Broadband Consultant, please stay on the line; we will be with you shortly,” I decided to put an end to this torture by telephone. By this time my neck was sore as hell and I finally realised that the reason I was waiting so long for this elusive Broadband Consultant, was probably because my service provider had not hired him or her yet.

Anyway, I tried another tact the following day; I got onto my service provider’s website at work, and bombarded them with nasty, nearly threatening mails and complaints about their poor service. This seemed to do the trick and my broadband link was restored on Friday afternoon.

So there you have it, don’t put up with poor service, get nasty…

The Silly Season Has Started

You just know the silly season is upon us, when there is an announcement that Public Office Bearers (POB’s) are to receive an 11% salary increase. Of this lot, there are arguably a few public departments that deserve their increases, such as the South African Revenue Services (SARS) who are doing an excellent job.

However, those POB’s who are better known as politicians surely do not deserve another cent, because their performance in all areas (except maybe the Minister of Finance), has been nothing short of atrocious. Since hardly any of these lazy, incompetent bunch of freeloaders have put in a decent days work, they should actually be asked to pay back some the fat salaries they have already drawn (notice I don’t say earned).

South African politicians have grown fat (literally) from the excessive perks they have awarded themselves, but their track records for service delivery makes for shameful reading. And to cap it all, such have they become enamoured to the trappings of luxury, that in order to maintain it, corruption and fraud has become the norm. Almost on a daily basis, incidents of fraud and corruption in public office are exposed, only to be met with glib denials by the perpetrators and their cohorts. If South Africa is not among the top ten most corrupt countries in the world today, I’d be most surprised.

So how about it Santa; this Christmas, could you please put in a good word for South Africa to be blessed with more honest politicians, the kind that earns their salaries and makes us feel proud, not disgusted to grant increases.

The T D Jakes Circus is Coming to Town

Yes folks, pastor T D Jakes, the notorious American evangelist, is blowing into Johannesburg this weekend, bringing with him his "annual" family oriented, conference and revival known as MegaFest. I'm not exactly sure what families do at such an event, but grovelling on hands and knees, submitting enthusiastically to brainwashing, and parting with cash, springs readily to mind.

And why exactly is the pastor coming to South Africa only now? It seems that since the inception of the MegaFest concept in 2004 in Atlanta, attendance figures has consistently dropped from around 500 000 to 100 000 or less in 2006. This alarming trend (to Jake's that is, who had grown used to the good life, while defending his ostentatious show of wealth) resulted in the event being cancelled altogether last year. It's reasonable to surmise that Jake's is running low on his reserves and needs an urgent cash injection. You know how tough it is maintaining all those houses, cars and the $45million Church called the Potter's House. So, the resourceful pastor looked up to the heavens and when he got no answer from there, he looked down, South actually, and realized that if a potato farmer can sucker 60 000 odd people into attending a Mighty Man conference, he could surely do better.

When interviewed on MSNBC, T D Jakes said "I think that Jesus is the product" and "when the product is excellent it doesn't require a big sales pitch." Since he is now leaving a potentially much bigger target audience to scam from, to come out to South Africa, one can only wonder why the "product" is not selling so well any more. Could it be that Americans are wising-up to religious scam artists? Or maybe it's just the current economic crises in the USA? Attendance figures for his MegaFest event had already started declining from 2005, so I tend to favour the former argument.

You know what's even scarier than T D Jakes coming to town this weekend? Nope? Angus Buchan, the potato farmer and upstart evangelist, is also scheduled to host his Mighty Men conference this very weekend in Heidelberg, not too far from where Jakes is hosting his MegaFest. How about that? I don't for one minute believe that they could have got their schedules mixed up. I am of the opinion that Angus Buchan deliberately scheduled his event on the same weekend to flex his muscles and see how big a (arguably deluded) crowd he can draw, with a big gun like TD in town. It would be interesting to read the attendance statistics after this weekends celebration of gullibility.

Viva la Vida - What does it all mean?

There has been much speculation recently on the "hidden" meaning in the lyrics of Coldplay's hit new song, Viva La Vida. Penned by Chris Martin, lead singer, pianist and husband to actress Gwyneth Paltrow, the song has become Coldplay's biggest hit.

Although some people listen to a song without actually thinking or caring about what the lyrics mean, others like myself, tend to appreciate good lyrics as one does good poetry, and we also wonder what the artist means by his words. I tend to believe that all songwriters write with great meaning, often hidden, which makes music all the more interesting. According to Wikipedia, the title Viva la Vida translates from Spanish into "long live life."

When asked by Q magazine about what he meant by the line "I know Saint Peter won't call my name" Chris Martin replied: "It's about… You're not on the list. I was a naughty boy. It's always fascinated me that idea of finishing your life and then being analyzed on it. And this idea runs throughout most religions. That's why people blow up buildings. Because they think they're going to get lots of virgins. I always feel like saying, just join a band. That is the most frightening thing you could possibly say to somebody. Eternal damnation. I know about this stuff because I studied it. I was into it all. I know it. It's still mildly terrifying to me. And this is serious."

At some point Chris has stated that he is not sure about the existence of God and has also been quoted as saying "I'm always trying to work out what 'He' or 'She' is," also saying "I don't know if it's Allah or Jesus or Mohammed or Zeus. But I'd go for Zeus." In effect Chris has been cagey about his religious affiliation, or lack thereof. However, with this album, I think he has finally revealed his lack of belief n God, or at the very least, strong reservations about God's existence. Arguably, the lyrics on other songs in the album such as Cemeteries of London and 42, hint at his religious doubts. So, with this I come to the crux of my essay: I think I may have cracked the real meaning behind the lyrics of Viva la Vida.

Let's take the first verse:

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sweep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own
I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing:
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"
One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of sand, pillars of sand

With this first verse (and subsequent verses), Chris assumes the position of the (imaginary, non-existent) God and laments the loss of power he once had (only in the minds of believers). "Now in the morning I sweep alone, Sweep the streets I used to own" is a reference to rational people abandoning religion in droves and realizing that religious claims (scripture etc.) are not real, hence the line "And I discovered that my castles stand, Upon pillars of sand."

The second verse:

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
Once you know there was never, never an honest word
That was when I ruled the world
(Ohhh)

These lines refer to the evangelists who spread fear and used religious rhetoric in order to convert and keep ordinary people in subservience, and enforce a blind faith in a God. The lines "Be my mirror my sword and shield, My missionaries in a foreign field" speaks of how these evangelists are no longer revered, or trusted. The lines "Once you know there was never, never an honest word, That was when I ruled the world" just confirms how lies were told to con the people, and how it kept (the idea of) God in power.

The third verse:

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in.
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People could not believe what I'd become
Revolutionaries Wait For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

The first three lines of this verse is a confession of the "wicked and wild" manner in which the idea of God (and religion) was spread. It goes on to acknowledge that people had started to realize how God was just a power mad, megalomaniac (in reality just a manifestation of ordinary people's own lust for power). "Revolutionaries Wait For my head on a silver plate" is a reference to non-believers (anti-theists and Atheists) who are waiting for the downfall of religion. "Just a puppet on a lonely string" is clear acknowledgement that ordinary men used religion (and the idea of God) to stake their claims for power, and that they were really pulling the strings all along (and still are). "Oh who would ever want to be king?" is off course the lament of an imaginary God who has been placed in an imaginary, untenable position.

The fourth verse:

I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world
(Ohhhhh Ohhh Ohhh)

The conviction evidenced by "I know Saint Peter won't call my name" is the final admission that that there is no Saint Peter, never was, and never will be.

The last verse:

Hear Jerusalem bells are ringings
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can not explain
I know Saint Peter will call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world
Oooooh Oooooh Oooooh"

"I know Saint Peter will call my name" appears to be a contradiction of the lines in the 4Th verse. However, since this is the closing verse of the song and, in the context of religion, it very cleverly pronounces the final death knell of (the idea of) God, as in being called to rest.

Now, I don't know about you, but I am of the opinion that this song is perhaps the most brilliant piece of anti-religion, without actually explicitly saying so.

Maybe Censorship Should be Banned

I recently came across a link to a site where Philip Pullman, author of Northern Lights, better known as The Golden Compass (adapted into a film of the same name starring Nicole Kidman and Daniel Craig), discusses how his book was challenged by various, mainly religious bodies, who demanded it be banned from the public library. Apparently, this bunch of ignorant theists deemed the book to be anti-religious.

Phillip goes on to recount how a group called the Catholic League objected to the release of the film which did result in bad box office takings, but sales of his book went up quite significantly. Even a bishop from La Crosse County, Jerome Listecki, warned Catholics not to see the film, ludicrously claiming that the movie was just “the first part of a trilogy that expresses hatred of Christianity and that portrays God, the church and religion as evil and oppressive, and urges children to join fallen angels in a rebellion against God.”

The Golden Compass is not the first book to attract such a vicious and absurd backlash from the religious hate-mongers, nor will it be the last. The successful Harry Potter series of novels has attracted disdain from the lunatic religious fringe in recent times, and don't forget the fatwa issued by Ayatollah Khomeini calling for the killing of Salman Rushdie, author of Midnight's Children and the Satanic Verses. This kind of dark ages mentality is indicative of the lengths that the religious wing nuts are prepared to resort to, in defense of a severely discredited and hate-filled dogma known mundanely as religion.

Phillip Pullman quite correctly points out that the "inevitable result of trying to ban something – book, film, play, pop song, whatever – is that far more people want to get hold of it than would ever have done if it were left alone." This simple fact however will not stop the lunatics from trying. Although all progressive (mostly democratic) countries propagate free speech, religions in these countries, enjoys unwarranted protection from being criticised. And it gets worse. These same self-appointed "keepers of morality" demand the right to decide what should be published, what should be censored, even what is taught in schools. In reality, even statistics show that those who proclaim to be the most religious are invariably the most corrupt and immoral.

Phillip sums it up quite nicely as follows:

"In fact, when it comes to banning books, religion is the worst reason of the lot. Religion, uncontaminated by power, can be the source of a great deal of private solace, artistic inspiration, and moral wisdom. But when it gets its hands on the levers of political or social authority, it goes rotten very quickly indeed. The rank stench of oppression wafts from every authoritarian church, chapel, temple, mosque, or synagogue – from every place of worship where the priests have the power to meddle in the social and intellectual lives of their flocks, from every presidential palace or prime ministerial office where civil leaders have to pander to religious ones."

"My basic objection to religion is not that it isn't true; I like plenty of things that aren't true. It's that religion grants its adherents malign, intoxicating and morally corrosive sensations. Destroying intellectual freedom is always evil, but only religion makes doing evil feel quite so good."

Gunning for Glory

The Gunners have been to "Hull" and back, and after last night's Champions League performance against FC Porto (Arsenal 4 - 0), it seems they are ready to face all their demons, and not just the Red Devils. There is serious talent in this squad, and I can't wait for them to "Leave-a-pool" of tears in their wake from Chelsea, United, Barcelona, Real Madrid and the rest...

The Funny Side of Religion

I received the following pictures by e-mail the other day, which claims to portray the funny side of religion.....as if there was actually any other side to religion.

A French car that's too fast for poor old Jesus!!!

But it sure beats listening to the preacher's sermon about sex!!!

Your brains need to be really frozen to fall for that one!!!

Finally, some truth from the church!!!

You guessed it, only in the bible belt!!!

That's right, the really dumb ones!!!

The New President's Men

Kgalema Motlanthe has been elected as the new President of South Africa, replacing Thabo Mbeki (until the next general elections at least), and he has chosen his new cabinet:

some old,

some new,

some boring,

some destined to flounder in the stew

Thankfully, Trevor Manuel has been retained as Minister of Finance. He certainly deserves the confidence shown in him. A breath of fresh air has been injected into the cabinet in the form of Barbara Hogan, new Minister of Health and Mohamed Surty, Minister of Justice and Constitutional Development. However, some tired and boring old stooges remain, viz. Jeff Radebe, Minister of the non-existent Transport system, Ivy Matsepe-Casaburri, Minister of (mis)Communications, Naledi Pandor, Minister of (un)Educated kids, and Aziz Pahad, Deputy Minister of sqeeking voices and interminably dull speeches about matters foreign to international affairs.

But the most frightening appointment in President Motlanthe's cabinet, is the retention (pun intended) of none other than Manto Tshabalala-Msimang, in the new position of Minister in the Presidency, vacated by Thabo's rottweiler, Essop Pahad. I know, many people are stunned, flabbergasted even. However, the deed is done, and I reckon we have to look at the bright side: the arrogant Essop is now a fable and Manto will no longer embarrass South Africa by making asinine statements about HIV and AIDS and spreading misinformation about beetroots. Indeed, Manto can look forward to an albeit short career, as Motlanthe's rottweiler in the Presidency, and spreading rabies instead.

Not All the President's Men

While I was watching Manchester United battle it out with Chelsea on Sunday, Thabo Mbeki was preparing to throw in the towel. When he announced his resignation as President on Sunday evening, I think it caught many South Africans by surprise; perhaps even those like Julius Malema, (puppet-on-a-string) President of the ANC Youth League (ANCYL), one of the chief agitators for Mbeki's ousting.

And today, nearly the rest of Mbeki's cabinet followed suite, but not quite. The cabinet Ministers and Deputy Ministers, including the Deputy President that resigned in quick succession, were clearly his closest supporters and hand-picked henchmen (and women). What has raised my eyebrows however is the resignation of one Minister who said he wouldn't, and those that chickened out or chose not to resign, not for the moment anyway.

Lets take a closer look at the President's men who are no more. Of this lot, I'll be truly happy to see the last of Essop Pahad, Minister in the Presidency; a really rude, unpleasant and arrogant man, described by Andrew Feinstein in his book "After the Party" as the "President's rottweiler." Good riddance also to Essop's brother, Aziz Pahad, Deputy Minister of Foreign Affairs, whose irritating voice (always sounded like someone was squeezing his jewels) could drive one quite mad. Also good to see going at last, is Alec Erwin, Public Enterprises Minister whose mismanagement and repeated lies in the Eskom Power debacle did not endure him to the public at large. If Ngconde Balfour and Loretta Jacobus, Minister and Deputy for Correctional Services did not resign, they should have been fired instead, for presiding over leaking jails and general maladministration of prison services. Not too much good could be said for the rest of the ship-jumpers; only Finance Minister Trevor Manuel stands out for the good work put into his Ministry which resulted in good economic growth and stability over a sustained period of time.

Back to what bothers me the most. The one person who has not resigned, but should have been canned a long time ago for gross incompetence is none other than the Minister of Alternative Medicine, the beetroot-loving, alcohol-soaked, Manto Tshabalala-Msimang. Why this pathetic disgrace to the country still clings onto her position as a Minister after being repeatedly discredited, is a mystery. Could only be the perks of the job, one of which probably entitles her to being placed first on the liver transplant recipient list.

The Clasping and Laying On of Hands - A Scientific and Religious Experience

A scientist clasps his hands, awaiting the outcome of an experiment. A worshipper clasps his hands in prayer, awaiting a divine answer. Two scenarios, each one producing a very different mental image.

One produces an image of joy, excitement, eagerness, self-belief, wonderment, fulfillment, and expectations of a result that may prove a hypothesis. The other image is one of despair, fear, self-doubt, and expectations of a magical intervention that addresses the request.

A palaeontologist, sitting cross-legged, in an excavation site, lays her hands on an ancient fossil she's just unearthed. A preacher in a crowded church lays his hands on the head of a new member who has decided to join the congregation.

One produces an image of excitement, joy, wonderment, eagerness to learn more, passion, and expectations of further scientific results that the discovery may lead to. The other produces an image of superstitious fear, deception, irrational behaviour, and expectations of a magical intervention that improves your life.

It's not too hard to see which hand gesture fits which scenario. It's also not that hard to choose which hand gesture you want to be associated with; I won't offer you a hand, I trust your mind will show you the way.

Street Name Changes

I recently received a long list (about 98) of street names in Durban, a large coastal city in South Africa, which are about to be changed, apparently to reflect the transformation about 14 years ago, to a multi-racial, democratic society. It's happening all over the country, not just Durban.

Personally, I couldn't give a flying @#!$ what streets are called. They're just street names after all. It's quite certain that those deceased who are being honored are in no position to care either. Those still living (or the family and relatives of the deceased) might puff their chests out and cause a nuisance every time in passing, they have to stop and stare at their names up on the street signs, but it's still just a name on a piece of wood or whatever they use these days to print street names on. Big deal.

What concerns me is the amount of money being wasted on ridiculous exercises like this when it (the money) could be put to better use, given that the country faces all kinds of problems. It also means that I now have to buy new maps for my Garmin again and that really pisses me off. So, to those dimwits who dream up crap like this, put this up on street signs at the city limits, "Welcome to Durban, Now Get Lost, Signed, The morons who changed the street names, while we know we should have rather fixed the potholes instead."

Help Me Explain This!!!

I'm thinking they should be wearing earmuffs, not sunglasses. How about you?

When Science and Religion Collide

I live in a small community of a few thousand mostly deeply religious people; a small group of Hindus and Christians dominated by a majority of Muslims. It's not hard to notice that the single Church, two temples and three mosques are frequented daily, and that each religious grouping are devout followers of their respective religions. This community is a microcosm of the religious fervour endemic the world over.

In Europe, on the other hand are a few thousand scientists who after fourteen years of collaboration, this week witnessed the fruits of their labour when the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) at CERN was switched on successfully. Amid threats to shut the project down over fears of safety by certain detractors, and doomsday predictions by the loony religious fringe, the first proton beams were injected into the LHC on the 10th September this week to complete a successful start up on the most expensive and probably most important scientific experiment in the history of mankind to date.

In stark contrast we have two groups of people; one looking for meaning and purpose in archaic religious texts and ultimately for salvation through blind faith, and the other nobly trying to unravel meaning and purpose and indeed, the secrets of the universe through scientific experiment. While scientists will be asking how the universe came to be the way it is, the religious faithful believe they already know and see no reason to question further. In life there can be no two endeavours that are more diametrically opposed to each other than science and religion; indeed religion is the antithesis of science. And while religionists vehemently oppose science, some have no qualms about engaging the detestable field of pseudo-science to prop up their dying religions as in the laughable hypothesis about Intelligent Design.

In the modern era, religion still dominates the lives of ordinary people in spite of the great advances in the science and the increasing evidence against religious dogma and superstitious practices. As scientific scrutiny closes in on irrational religious thinking, I'm constantly amazed at the mental gymnastics employed by the religious institutions, the evangelists, clerics, clergy, priests and common shysters, to find new ways to "keep the faith alive." Religion is big business, and I guess there is a vested interest to ensure its survival.

The future benefits of the LHC and the experiments to be conducted at CERN are obvious to all but the firmly religious. The one benefit not listed, and the one that amuses me no end, is how this scientific event has sparked some fear and loathing into the religious establishment. Take Ray Comfort for example, an evangelist whose recent blog "Its a Sick World" questions the spending of 10 billion dollars over 14 years on the LHC project when the money could be used for feeding starving children in Africa. It is typical of the dishonesty and bigotry of the religious movement who have squandered many more billions in furthering the aims of useless religions. One could also ask why he has never questioned the US Government's expenditure in an untenable war in Iraq, which makes the LHC budget look like small change. No, Ray like the rest of the religious rabble don't concern themselves too much with starving children; right now he is more concerned about how the scientific experiments at CERN is going to affect his business of selling salvation.

While I know it's irrational to suggest that we use the LHC to accelerate different religions at nearly the speed of light from opposite directions so that they collide and smash each other into oblivion, I wish we could. Is it too much to ask?

God Hates Jazz

Three years ago Hurricane Katrina struck New Orleans with a fury that was described by some evangelists such as Pat Robertson as God's revenge for abortion and homosexuality among other things considered as "evil" by these hate mongering preachers.

After the death and destruction wreaked by Katrina, the poor people of New Orleans were subjected to further pain and suffering when they were shamefully abandoned by the Republican government of George Bush. According to Michael Moore, on the day that Katrina broke the first levees (dikes), George Bush was apparently partying with John McCain, and they continued having fun at a fundraiser, a full day afterwards, while New Orleans was flooding.

Last week, another evangelist, the Rev. James Dobson, a well-known right wing nut-job and also considered as a New Hitler for the Twenty-First Century, called for his dim-wit followers to pray for a storm so that Barrack Obama's acceptance speech at the Democratic Convention in Denver, would be cancelled. However in an ironic turn of events, the storm in the form of Hurricane Gustav was set to hit New Orleans again and Louisiana where The Republican National Convention was scheduled to take place.

Now some are saying that God has a great sense of humor by punishing the Republicans and their supporters, such as the Rev. Dobson. But it surely has to make one wonder if "He" just does not like Jazz music and can't stand to see folks having a good time (as they usually do in New Orleans).

Slipknot Honoured at Kerrang! Awards

Only days after being vilified by religious wackos in the small town of Mogale City, for allegedly inspiring a juvenile delinquent to commit murder at a high school, heavy metal band Slipknot were honoured at the 2008 Kerrang! Awards held in London, with the Icon award.

I wonder what the Theist loony brigade think about this development? I'll bet they are all confidently affirming that the devil rewarded Slipknot for a job well done in leading a young kid astray. Trust these "death worshipping" wing nuts to turn an innocent event into a vision of the imaginary "end-times."

Big up to Slipknot for winning the award which is well deserved. You guys are an icon. To all the religionists is Mogale City and elsewhere; eat your silly little hearts out.

South African Religionists Allege That Slipknot Are Competing Unfairly, Using Poetry to Brainwash Youth

This is a follow up to my recent blog about the religious twit who (still) insists that heavy metal band, Slipknot and Satan are responsible for leading a kid into killing a fellow pupil at a Krugersdorp school earlier this week. The title for my follow-up blog is an indication of how I would report the incident, if I was a newspaper editor.

Almost a week has passed, and the consensus of opinion, both written and verbal (broadcast and socialized) is that Slipknot and Satan cannot be held responsible for the behaviour of the kid who committed the atrocity. However, there are many commentators, with a religious leaning who still hold on to the preposterous notion that the kid was influenced by Satanic lyrics from Slipknot's recordings. To my utter disgust, it has also been revealed that Pierre Eksteen (my twit of the week), originally reported as a community leader, is in fact a member of the local clergy (Pastor).

In further developments, it seems that the Ninja kid has "given his heart to God" and "accepted Jesus" after appearing in Court yesterday. I viewed an online video of him leaving the court buildings and he looked particularly happy. Maybe he had already found Jesus by then, or maybe he was just basking in all the media attention; one can never tell. Let me just comment that I'm not the only person asking why he did not "find Jesus" last week, which would have resulted in the victim still being alive today. As one blogger commented "I just have to shake my head in amazement. Turn to the devil when you want power, turn to God when you are in 'shit'? Religion of convenience."

I've been following the online commentary during the week as the story unfolded, and they range from extremely intelligent and insightful from the non-religious or moderate segment of the community, to utter banality and outright rubbish from religious dimwits. One guy from the religious loony brigade went so far as to suggest that non-religious persons are "too thick" to understand how Satan works. Therefore Satan infects only the minds of intelligent (and presumably religious) people. According to him Satan plies his trade by "dividing and conquering" the intelligent, and so he does not bother with "thick" (non-religious) people. I'll leave you to ponder how intelligent this guy (and the thinking) is.

I cannot understand how the band members from Slipknot can be regarded as evil (Satanists) by merely expressing themselves through poetry. Would you automatically consider an artist who paints a nude study, a pervert or rapist? If, as these religious delinquents believe, people are inspired by mere words (Slipknot's lyrics) to perpetrate horrendous acts of violence and even murder, then you have to question the Bible (and other religious texts, most notably those from the Abrahamic religions) to do the same. In fact you don't have to go further than the Old Testament to be inspired to commit all sorts of atrocities. Richard Dawkins wrote in his book The God Delusion, "The God of the Old Testament is arguably the most unpleasant character in all fiction: jealous and proud of it; a petty, unjust, unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive, bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously malevolent bully." And yet, these writings are considered as the basis for morality.

So, what's that about Slipknot's lyrics again?

Twit of the Week - 06

I haven't written anything for a while; since catching a flu virus, but it's given me some time to catch up on some reading and other research. I have also not written a "Twit of the Week" blog for some time, but we are not fully into this week yet, and there's already a candidate shouting out to be honoured as such.

Earlier this morning in Mogale City (previously known as Krugersdorp), the small conservative mining town I live in, a high school pupil wielding a Ninja sword, killed one student , injured another seriously and caused minor injuries to two men employed as gardeners by the school. Apparently he arrived at school carrying about three Ninja swords, face painted black, and wearing a mask that made him resemble the drummer from Metal band, Slipknot. The press reported the incident as an alleged Satanic act. Now you might be thinking that this murderous teenager is my Twit of the Week. Well, actually he is not. This misdirected fool is only a product of poor parenting, and a victim of a pathetic school system that has lost control and a society that has created Gods and Devils.

And that brings me to our Twit of the Week, none other than community leader Pierre Eksteen, who is also reportedly in charge of a school support network for children. This supposed leader when interviewed after the incident, made it very clear that Satanic music was the cause of the attack, stating that "He came here camouflaged as the guy from Slipknot. We know the wrong kind of music and drugs have bad effects. Young people need to be informed of the effects of bad Satanic music." What the blazes is "bad Satanic music?" It never ceases to amaze me how religious tards can immediately conclude that in every case where some kid known to like Heavy Metal music and who has on his person anything resembling black, is involved in Satanic practices. Hey Mr. Eksteen, I happen to love Heavy Metal music and Slipknot for that matter and I also frequently dress in black outfits, so I must also be a Satanist, right?

Well Mr. Community leader Eksteen, let me spell it out for you and all those other religious cretins who make similar allegations. I don't believe in Satan, or God for that matter and I certainly don't worship either. I am not the one who invented Satan. You and the rest of the Theist crowd invented Satan, just as they invented God. So let me put forward my conclusion: You and your religious masters are ultimately responsible for screwing up this kids mind and causing him to commit such a heinous act. Conclusions! Nasty how they can be made so easily, hey?

Ethics and Atheism

There was a time, when it was considered unethical to be an Atheist. Fortunately for us, times have changed and independent rational thinking is as widely accepted as the fact that the Earth is not flat and at the centre of the universe. However, it is one thing to adopt a moral position and then behave in a manner that violates the "unwritten" code of conduct or behavior that that position espouses.

Allow me to explain what has lead me into this field of thought. Since my "conversion" back to Atheism, I have become somewhat over-exuberant in making my feelings, discussions and discoveries about Atheism known to all and sundry by sending out frequent e-mails. I was totally unaware that some, if not all recipients would take a dim view to being inundated with information on this particular life-view. Recently however, I received a scathing rebuke from my Uncle in Canada which stated "You're as harassing as a religionist who is bent on his beliefs." Initially, I just laughed it off with a not entirely convincing bravado of someone who will go to war for his beliefs.

Thankfully, while on business up North in Limpopo Province for a couple of days, I had a chance to reflect on my behavior, while lying in my hotel room. And it struck me how my enthusiasm for learning and unsolicited sharing of information could be and indeed become "harassing." I do sometimes become annoyed when I'm bombarded with dubious material for one or the other religion, so why should the faithful (or not) not feel the same when treated similarly. It is thus I come to the realization that ethical behavior is paramount, especially when one has adopted a moral position that should be beyond reproach. Consequently, I am asserting that an evangelical disposition is both immoral and unethical.

For this reason, I will no longer send out e-mails pertaining to Atheism or Theism for that matter. I will however still utilize these blogs to carry on the noble fight for Atheism, because you visit this site voluntarily.

Cameras, Revenue Generators and Automobiles

Earlier this afternoon, while at a local shopping mall, I noticed a duo of female traffic officers on foot, issuing traffic tickets to vehicles parked in the (private) parking area adjoining the mall. I stopped to observe for a while because I hadn’t seen this variety of traffic officer in quite a while. In the old days we used to refer to female traffic officers as “meter maids” because they would ticket vehicles parked next to expired parking meters on city streets.

I approached them to enquire under what municipal by-law they were authorised to issue traffic fines on private property (the shopping mall is presumably private property). It was obvious they didn’t know, and one lady indicated that because the entrance to the mall did not have boom gates, it was deemed an extension of municipal property and thus subject to the jurisdiction of the local Metro Police. By this logic, the land attached to my home could also be regarded as municipal property because I do not have boom gates installed at the entrance, either. Not satisfied, I left to continue my shopping, and when I re-emerged from the mall, about half an hour later, the “meter maids” had disappeared.

When I got home, I sent a mail off to the Mayors office enquiring about the legality of issuing traffic fines on private property and vented my anger. To quote myself, I wrote “I wish to also state that I find this activity of the Metro Police extremely reprehensible since they are clearly ‘lazy’ or incompetent or both in chasing the real threats to road safety, but are content to ‘camp’ at shopping malls chasing easy targets.”

My anger at the behaviour of our Metro Police is shared by practically everyone in this country. Daily we observe these fat pigs sitting comfortably under conveniently located shady trees, pointing speed cameras at passing motorists, while ignoring the traffic chaos caused by faulty traffic lights, a few blocks down the road. Their first priority is to issue as many traffic fines as possible. Traffic safety is not even secondary; it is an irritation that gets in the way of their daily siestas. That they are primarily employed to generate revenue for the local Metro Councils, is a well known source of mirth for the public.

And it just gets worse with the advent of newer technology. As the sophistication of the camera equipment they use to trap motorists, improves, their mobility correspondingly decreases. They no longer have to place these twin strips of wire (connected to a trapping unit) on the roads and then jump up from their seated position to flag down an offending motorist. No, these days all they need to do is sit comfortably under a shaded tree and the trapping equipment captures a photograph of the speeding vehicle. There are even fixed position cameras mounted on poles at various sites along motorways, which presumably frees the traffic pigs to enjoy longer siestas elsewhere. As a result of this decreased mobility, it’s not hard to notice how the girths of most traffic pigs have steadily increased.

The other irritation for motorists these days apart from the constant traffic, is the road blocks set up frequently by the Metro Police (read traffic pigs) to find those who have defaulted on payment of traffic fines. And the amazing thing is that these bastards don’t even try to hide the fact that they are stopping vehicles, invariably causing huge traffic congestion, just to look for motorists with outstanding payments against their names. The expenditure on the technology, manpower and vehicles to perform these exercises is an abomination and a criminal waste of taxpayers money.

Are we going to get real traffic officers back? Nah, I don’t believe so. Using these dimwits for revenue generation is proving to be a real rosy deal for the powers that be…

Twit of the Week - 05

My weekly rendition of the "twit of the week" is a little late this time around, but that's not because there is suddenly a dearth of twits. On the contrary, there are any number of twits each week, banging on the doors of the halls of twit-dome.

Take for example, Zwelinzima Vavi, Secretary General of trade union, Cosatu whose recent comments about "killing for Zuma" went unpunished by the South African Human Rights Commission. To top that, during a strike-march last week, the twit called on the government to zero-rate (from VAT) the five basic commodities. Four of the basic five commodities are already zero-rated. Seems like mouthing off with little thought, is second nature to this clown. But, he actually does not make it into the halls of twit-dome (not this time anyway). You see, last week, a trio of murderous delinquents "high on religion" managed to earn entry instead.

26-year-old Nicolette and 20-year-old Hardus Lotter murdered their parents, Gerhardus and Magdelena in an affluent suburb of Durban, South Africa. And the dirty deed was apparently done under the influence of 21-year-old Matthew Naidoo, a religious nutcase who claimed to be the "third son of God." Matthew told the siblings that God wanted their parents. You have to be pretty far gone to believe that you are a son of a non-existent God, and even more loony to actually allow yourself to be convinced to kill by such a cretin. As Voltaire observed "Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities."

Now, will the "second-son-of-God" please identify yourself so that we can incarcerate you in a padded room, before you also entice someone to kill for your non-existent God.

Another Religious Lie That Came Through My e-Mail

Secularism is on the rise and so is Atheism. The signs are everywhere. More and more people across the planet are realizing that religion is a fraud. More Atheists are revealing themselves openly, especially in America, once thought of as becoming increasingly fundamentalist.

And the religious movements, proponents and apologists are all too aware of this shift away from their organizational clutches. Initially it was the cults and new-age existentialist movements that attracted both the weak-minded and disillusioned away from mainstream religions, but in the age of the World Wide Web, information is the new "God." Information has exposed the irrational and illogical, and has replaced the imaginary power of God with a tangible alternative. Not that this alternative needs to be worshipped; it only needs to be acknowledged as a real power.

It is thus not surprising that religious organizations and self-serving individuals have resorted to using this information medium for spreading lies, half-truths, mis-quotes and disingenuous statistics, in a ludicrous attempt to confuse, mis-inform and keep the religiously inclined within their control. I recently posted an essay on a hoax mail about people who apparently mocked God, and I received another one recently. However, if you go to this page on the Snopes.com site, there are quite a few listed there.

Entitled, The Hands of God, the mail contained the following photograph and claim:

This is awesome! This certainly should make believers out of non-believers. Praise the Lord! Would you look at this picture? It reminds me of that song "He's got the whole word in his hands." He is definitely in control. I needed this today more than ever. Enjoy and pass it along. Photo taken in Kentucky .

Cara Winship sent this out it is called: God's hands. I took this picture on Hwy 30, traveling to London , KY. It has given me strength in the times of trouble. I feel I should share it with the rest of the world. I hope it is an inspiration to you. It just goes to show what we already know.... We have a God and he's watching over us. I e-mailed this picture to News Chanel 36. I was contacted by Meteorologist John James. He said that this picture of the sky is showing up, in all states, around the world. He wanted to know where I was from and where I took it. He saw a similar picture taken in Texas . He said this is amazing to him!

And my response:

This is not awesome. It’s just pathetic lies from religious cretins.
It certainly does not make me a believer. Actually, I’m even more of a non-believer now that I’ve seen this lame attempt to spread religious lies.
It reminds me of the song “liar, liar your pants are on fire…”
Er, no “He’s” definitely not in control if “He” is allowing such rubbish to be passed on as the truth.
John James?, Chanel 36 News, Cara Winship are all morons and liars.

Now here is what the real picture looked like before it was digitally defaced with a Photoshop clone tool. Wasn't it a better picture before the religionists got their "grubby hands" on it?

Gore's Generational Challenge to Repower America

On Thursday former Vice President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Al Gore issued a bold challenge: that 100 percent of U.S. electricity production come from sources with zero carbon emissions within 10 years.

A video and the full text of his speech given in Washington DC can be accessed from the We Can Solve It website. Although the challenge was issued to Americans, I believe that it is applicable to every country in the world today. I am hoping that our own President (and the one waiting in the wings) will take heed and adjust our own environmental policy to encompass this challenge.

Twit of the Week - 04

This week lucky motorist, Absolom Morifi joins a rag-tag pack of politicians and rabid religionists in the halls of twitdome. Absolom may have been lucky in escaping on Tuesday with his life, from a massive pile-up on the N1 in Johannesburg, near the Buccleugh Interchange, which resulted in excess of 20 cars being totalled, but is a twit nonetheless. Here's why.

Absolom cancelled his insurance policy on the morning of the very day that his car was flattened, together with several others by a runaway truck, and he had to be cut out of the wreckage with barely a scratch. But that's not the reason why he is a twit, as many people cancel insurance policies when times are tough, to channel money to areas where it is desperately needed. Absolom however cancelled his insurance policy of R1, 400 a month so that he could pay this amount over to the Rhema Church instead as a monthly tithe. Apparently Absolom felt guilty (or more likely was made to feel guilty) about not paying his tithes, when he visited the church that previous Sunday.

You have to be a real twit when you feel your church needs your money more than you do, and you go to the extent of cancelling your insurance policy. I can't really heap all the blame on Rhema Church here since their business empire is based on raking in the cash by dispensing guilt, and Absolom bought into that willingly. I dread to think how many others are in this same position?

Religious Hoax e-Mails - People Who Mocked God

We all receive them. The claims are invariably too fantastic to be true. Anyone with half a brain will see right through them, and yet recipients of these mails, keep forwarding them on. They usually contain some sort of promise of good luck or a veiled threat of misfortune should you not "forward on to 10 persons. I normally have a good laugh while reading, and then delete.

I received one the other day, the contents of which was really menacing, and which leads me to believe that the purveyors of religious filth are becoming really desperate to maintain this delusional thinking and are prepared to stoop really, really low to achieve this. These religious cretins have resorted to misquoting prominent persons, quoting out of context, twisting quotes to suit the occasion, disingenuously using statistics and even propagating blatant lies. I have even been told by some that lying for God is OK.

See what you make of this before reading my responses below (for the sake of utilizing space optimally, I have copied and pasted the contents of the mail without the eye-catching font size, paragraphing, color scheme and other formatting):

DID YOU KNOW THESE FACTS? I SURE DIDN'T TILL NOW
Death is certain but the
Bible speaks about untimely death!
Make a personal reflection about
this.....
Very interesting, read until the end.....
It is written in the
Bible (Galatians 6:7):
'Be not deceived; God is not mocked:
for
whatsoever a man sow, that shall he also reap.
Here are some men and women
who mocked God :

John Lennon (Singer):
Some years before, during his interview with
an American Magazine, he said:
'Christianity will end, it will disappear. I
do not have to argue about that. I am certain. Jesus was OK, but his subjects
were too simple, today we are more famous than Him' (1966).
Lennon, after
saying that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ, was shot six times.

Tancredo Neves (President of Brazil ):
During the
Presidential campaign, he said if he got 500,000 votes from his party, not even
God would remove him from Presidency.
Sure he got the votes, but he got sick
a day before being made President, then he died.

Cazuza (Bi-sexual Brazilian composer, singer and poet):
During A show in Canecio ( Rio de Janeiro ), while smoking his cigarette, he
puffed out some smoke into the air and said:'God, that's for you.'
He died
at the age of 32 of LUNG CANCER in a horrible manner.

The man who built the Titanic
After the construction of
Titanic, a reporter asked him how safe the Titanic would be. With an ironic tone
he said: 'Not even God can sink it'
The result: I think you all know what
happened to the Titanic

Marilyn Monroe (Actress)
She was visited by Billy Graham
during a presentation of a show. He said the Spirit of God had sent him to
preach to her. After hearing what the Preacher had to say, she said: 'I don't
need your Jesus'.
A week later, she was found dead in her
apartment

Bon Scott (Singer)
The ex-vocalist of the AC/DC. On one of
his 1979 songs he sang: 'Don't stop me; I'm going down all the way, down the
highway to hell'.
On the 19th of February 1980, Bon Scott was found dead, he
had been choked by his own vomit.

Campinas (IN 2005)
In Campinas , Brazil a group of friends,
drunk, went to pick up a friend.....
The mother accompanied her to the car
and was so worried about the drunkenness of her friends and she said to the
daughter holding her hand, who was already seated in the car: 'My Daughter, Go
With God And May He Protect You. She responded: 'Only If He (God) Travels In The
Trunk, Cause Inside Here.....It's Already Full '
Hours later, news came by
that they had been involved in a fatal accident, everyone had died, the car
could not be recognized what type of car it had been, but surprisingly, the
trunk was intact. The police said there was no way the trunk could have remained
intact. To their surprise, inside the trunk was a crate of eggs, none was
broken

Christine Hewitt (Jamaican Journalist and entertainer) said the
Bible (Word of God) was the worst book ever written. In June 2006 she was found
burnt beyond recognition in her motor vehicle.

Many more important people have forgotten that there is no other name
that was given so much authority as the name of Jesus. Many have died, but only
Jesus died and rose again, and he is still alive.

'Jesus'

PS: If it was a joke, you would have sent it to everyone. So are
you going to have courage to send this?.
I have done my part, Jesus said 'If
you are embarrassed about me, I will also be embarrassed about you before my
father.'

You are my 8 in 8 seconds. I am not breaking this. No
way!
I'M TOLD THIS WORKS!!!!! Bishop T.D. Jakes '8 Second Prayer.' Just
repeat this prayer and see how God moves!!
'Lord, I love you and I need you,
come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus'
name. Amen.'
Pass this message to 8 people {EXCEPT YOU AND ME}.You will
receive a miracle tomorrow. I Hope that you don't ignore and let God bless you.

The Real Facts
The very first line is a lie, because what follows is anything but the facts.
Death is always untimely, period. I've never heard any dead person saying his or her death was timely. An observer however may give his/her opinion about the timeliness.
Here is what John Lennon really said: "Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink. I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right. We're more popular than Jesus now; I don't know which will go first — rock and roll or Christianity. Jesus was all right, but his disciples were thick and ordinary. It's them twisting it that ruins it for me." There is nothing wrong with this analysis by Lennon, and as one poster on Snopes.com (the urban myths site) so rightfully pointed out, at the time Lennon made this comment, you could not find any massive throngs of people, screaming in excitement, queuing up for hours to get into church. Incidentally, why did this vindictive God take 14 years to punish Lennon for making the quote in 1966? Maybe he had his hands full punishing all the other blasphemers in the world, and could only get around to Lennon in 1980. The truth is, Lennon achieved greatness before he died and his memory lives on - what more can you ask from life?
Let's assume for the sake of argument that Tancredo Neves did make the statement about God as claimed. And yes, he did become ill a day before his inauguration as President and died about a month later from abdominal complications. His death was followed by an outpouring of grief from the citizens of Brazil who regarded him as a liberator from the previous dictatorial regimes. In honour of Tancredo Neves, he is listed as an official President of Brazil although he never took office, and the Tancredo Neves International Airport in Belo Horizonte is named after him. He died, but his memory and honour lives on. This guy had more honour than any imaginary vindictive God. The truth is, Neves achieved greatness before he died and his memory lives on - what more can you ask from life?
Let's assume for the sake of argument that Cazuza did make the statement about God as claimed. Yes, Cazuza (real name Agenor Miranda Araujo Neto) was openly bisexual and died from an AIDS related illness at the age of 32. Cazuza's honesty about his AIDS infection helped to change public perceptions about the disease. He is considered as a leading example of Brazilian Rock Music and is still an inspiration to latter day artists. Yet again, an honourable and revered person whose memory lives on. Yep, he's still smoking!!! And all ye faithful can put that in your pipes and smoke it. The truth is, Cazuza achieved greatness before he died and his memory lives on - what more can you ask from life?
The man who was responsible for building the Titanic probably did not say "Not even God can sink it," but lets assume he did. So to punish him, this vindictive God causes the ship to sink, resulting in the deaths of more than 1500 people, including the shipbuilder, Thomas Andrews. Now why do you believe in this monster again? At the time, the Titanic was a marvel of engineering. Thomas Andrews achieved greatness before he died and his memory lives on - what more can you ask from life?
So what if Marilyn Monroe told Billy Graham she did not need his Jesus? Any intelligent person who understood that religion is a drug would have said as much. Why would she want any more drugs? Those she was already hooked on were adequate and so the Jesus-drug was not necessary. Anyway by this time, Monroe had already achieved greatness and will forever be remembered - what more can you ask from life?
Rock stars such as Bon Scott of AC/DC are artists who make use of poetic lyrics to express themselves. To say that he actually meant literally that he was "going down the highway to hell" is rather disingenuous. Claims of death by choking in his own vomit are conspiracy theories. Scott, an asthmatic, actually died of alcohol poisoning, while sleeping in a car, after a night of heavy drinking. By this time, Scott had already achieved greatness and his memory lives on. His grave in Australia is not only the most visited there, but is listed as a heritage site. Has anyone visited Jesus grave recently?
The alleged Campinas accident is the stuff of urban legend. Notice that no names or dates are provided to verify the incident. But at least we now know that the safest place to store eggs, is in the trunk of a car.
Christine Hewitt was absolutely correct to say that the bible was the worst book ever written. The kind of filth portrayed in the bible as the word of some supernatural power that has dominion over us all, cannot be regarded as good by any intelligent, rational, thinking person. Hewitt was probably killed by some religious maniac, but we will never know. At the time of her death she had already achieved prominence in society and will be forever remembered for the good work she did.
In the end, the authors of this hate-mail have merely proven that their imaginary God is not only conceited and vengeful, but downright incompetent as well. This imaginary murderer has failed dismally to snuff out the greatness of those who have been perceived to have rejected and mocked him.

Meeting Jesus by Accident

Driving home from work this afternoon, I approached a set of traffic lights at an intersection where a line of cars were waiting for the lights to change. As I approached the vehicle at the back of the queue, a white Opel Corsa hatchback, the first thing that caught my eye, was a large blue decal emblazoned with the word "Jesus" plastered across the upper half of the rear window. Only thereafter, did I notice that the rear end of the car was totalled; light clusters, bumper, wheel arch, the lot.

The first thing that crossed my mind was that this sorry-looking car had been rear-ended by someone desperately wanting to meet Jesus. I know it was a wicked thought, but natural nonetheless. Remember, I was first drawn to the Jesus-sticker, before I noticed the damage on the rear end. Damn, I am definitely not placing any decals on the rear of my vehicle and fish-signs are on top of that list. I most certainly don't want anyone crawling up my rear end to get in touch with God.

Twit of the Week - 03

As an avowed advocate of equality between the sexes, I have no qualms about naming a women as a twit if it is deserved. This week the honour belongs to Frene Ginwala, and I dare say, is long overdue.

If you need someone to cover up Government chicanery, corruption, nepotism and incompetence with a commission of enquiry, then there is no one better qulaified to head it, than Frene Ginwala. The former Speaker of Parliament, gained notoriety for among other things, her refusal to censure former Minister of Mineral and Energy Affairs, Penuell Maduna for his misguided attacks against the then Auditor-General and her deceit in the Arms Scandal Investigation a few years back. Her loyalty to Thabo Mbeki however, is unquestionable. Her aptitude to obfuscate to protect her masters, was amply demonstrated during the hearings into the arms scandal and exposed by Andrew Feinstein in his book "After the Party" where he referred to her as a "sari-clad dominatrix."

Her addition to the halls of twitdome however, comes as a result of her recent appointment to chair the commission of enquiry into suspended National Prosecuting Authority head, Vusi Pikoli's fitness to hold office. Pikoli was axed by President Thabo Mbeki after he spearheaded the investigation and prosecution of disgraced former commissioner of Police, Jackie Selebi. Mbeki cited a breakdown in the relationship between Pikoli and Justice Minister, Brigitte Mabandla as the reason for his suspension. Every decent thinking South African knows however that this is not the case; Mbeki is merely protecting Selebi.

True to form, the Ginwala Commission has been a total waste of time thus far, and Frene is playing her part to perfection, in support of her masters and delaying the execution of justice, by not calling Brigitte Mabandla to testify. Frene Ginwala is well and truly set to whitewash yet another inquiry.

Dinosaur Management

Earlier this year, in April to be exact, I posted an essay on why I don't acquire any further business-related qualifications to advance my career in the company I presently work for. You may recall that I was adamant about not becoming one of the "corporate crooks" who darken the halls of power in companies everywhere.

Today, my decision was vindicated. As a project Manager, I am called upon occasionally to make presentations to Senior Management about a particular high-profile project I'm working on at the time. Usually the presentation involves providing project status information, identifying risks and problems, and expenditure reporting. Currently I am working on a very high-profile project, mired in politics and with serious image ramifications for the country. Because of the sensitive nature of the project, I cannot reveal any more details. But that is irrelevant. What is relevant however, is how my presentation was treated by Senior Management.

Prior to making the presentation, I was issued with a presentation format that really did not suite the type of information I was supposed to disclose. Obviously, whoever came up with the format was not really knowledgeable about the technologies involved in the project. The format I was being coerced into using did not allow me to reveal adequately the scale or complexity of the project from a holistic perspective. Needless to say, I went ahead and compiled the presentation in my own format which I found to be most suitable, all-inclusive and logically structured, for the occasion. I knew that it would be met with disapproval, and that it could potentially have serious ramifications for my future, but I went ahead anyway.

The Senior Managers at the meeting wasted no time in attacking my presentation format, when it was projected onto the screen. Nobody seemed interested in the information it contained; one Senior Manager in particular was extremely pedantic about it all. My explanations were dismissed outright, and he insisted that I change the format for the next meeting. In the end, we did not discuss anything contained in the presentation report which was the whole point of the meeting in the first instance, because everyone was more focused on the format. I could see the uncomfortable looks on the faces of those present; they just wanted me to stop arguing so that they could conclude the meeting and get out of there, back to their comfort zones. I know some were thinking, who is this upstart who is challenging the status quo? Eventually I gave in, but made it clear that I did not agree with the idea. The relief in the room was palpable as I walked out.

Reflecting back on the presentation meeting, several things stuck in my mind. How Management pay lip service to creativity, innovation and initiative. When confronted by a real live situation they quickly show how little they care for it. Clinging onto the tried and trusted, the familiar, is the norm. That is why this company is having trouble holding onto its most talented people; their creativity is stifled, innovation frightens the "hangers-on" in power positions. Upsetting the status quo is like committing a treasonous offense. This organization produces a multitude of report writers and report readers, buys and creates several in-house information gathering systems, but hardly any analyzers and problem-solvers. You always have to work hard to satisfy the systems; they invariably don't work for you.

The decision-makers don't have a clue; they are focused acutely on enriching the shareholders. I never want to be part of this clique of comfortable dinosaurs. That is why I have no desire to climb the corporate ladder.

Creating a Quote

Recently I came across a book by Acharya S, "The Christ Conspiracy: The Greatest Story Ever Sold" on her website Truth Be Known. Acharya S, real name D.M. Murdock, is credited for researching and supplying the Christ-myth material used in the Internet film Zeitgeist (please be patient and listen to the introduction before the film starts, about 4 minutes).

The book title reminded me of a line from one of George Carlin's shows "Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told." This gave me an idea; why don't I create a quote using Acharya's book title with a George Carlinesque twist. And presto:

Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever sold

How about that?

Twit of the Week - 02

This week I had a tough time deciding between Julius Malema, and the African Union (AU). By their respective actions, both demonstrated an equal affinity, in deserving entrance into the halls of twit-dome.


Let's start with Julius Malema, the not so youthful President of the ANC Youth League (ANCYL). Malema made a name for himself as a student activist (his most noteworthy achievements include leading disrespectful and unruly students on destructive rampages through the streets of Johannesburg) and was endorsed as President of the ANCYL after a disputed leadership election (shades of Zimbabwe and Robert Mugabe). This twit earns his title by making repeated use of the hate-inspiring and inflammatory statements "We are prepared to die for Zuma," and "We are prepared to take up arms and kill for Zuma." He later refused to apologise, and disingenuously tried to deny meaning it literally. Even worse was to follow; Zwelinzima Vavi, Congress of South African Trade Unions secretary general, practically repeated verbatim the phrases used by Malema, Blade Nzimande, South African Communist Party secretary general, accused the South African Human Rights Commission (SAHRC) of being a "kangaroo court" when they demanded a retraction of Malema's statements, and all the while Jacob Zuma, potentially the future President of South Africa, has remained quiet and un-leader-like. I will say no more about Malema, but Fred Khumalo of the Times sums him up quite wittily in The boy in the bubble.


Now onto the AU, an organization that has been spectacularly unsuccessful as a body formed with lofty ideals for the African continent. With the exception of a handful of leaders, this organization consists of 53 African heads of State, largely despots. By issuing a statement calling for a "government of national unity" in Zimbabwe after the recent shameful election staged and stolen by Robert Mugabe, this collection of twits (with the exception of the some leaders such as Kenyan Prime Minister Raila Odinga and Ernest Koroma, President of Sierra Leone) deserve nothing but derision and initiation into the halls of twit-dome. On the other hand, the total lack of leadership from South African President, Thabo Mbeki throughout this whole debacle, is not only legendary, but has cast a dark shadow over the Southern tip of Africa. It makes one wonder if we are also headed in the same direction as Zimbabwe.

Scary Holiday Destinations: Zimbabwe (in) Ruins

What can I say about the situation in Zimbabwe that has not already been said. If you're planning a visit to see the Zimbabwe Ruins any time soon - don't. You are likely to see a lot more that is ruined, like the entire country for instance. Robert Mugarbage (what clever people on another blog I read recently have taken to calling this pile of turd) has stolen another election. Here are some images that tell the (sorry) tale:

And my personal favorite (you can substitute AU for SADC, AU meaning Assholes Union)

Twit of the Week - 01

This week there is a real toss-up between Robert Mugabe, demented incumbent dictator, and Angus Buchan self-appointed prophet and erstwhile potato farmer from Greytown, Kwa-Zulu Natal. Seeing as Mugabe qualifies for twit-of-the-decade, and I have already berated him in a previous post this week, Angus Buchan is the winner this time.

Why Angus you may ask? Well, an interview with Angus was broadcast on Carte Blanche last Sunday, probably after his "successful" Mighty Men Conference (MMC) held on his farm, one weekend in April this year. The good evangelist boasted how 60 000 men turned up; he claims they were not invited ("And you're going to ask me - the next question is - who invited them? I don't know - they just came. I mean, there were no big speakers here... it was just us."). Turns out that 80 percent of those who attended were farmers, mostly Afrikaners, presumably looking for a quick-fix to all their problems. The fact that mostly Afrikaners attended is telling in itself; this group are becoming increasingly marginalized in the new Apartheid-free democratic South Africa. It's easy to see that they were looking for some sort of miracle; maybe Angus could help them pray for a return perhaps, to the days when their bibles vindicated their abuse of black farm workers, and their hegemony on ruling the country.

But Angus, from a misguided sense of morality gleaned from his precious bible, decided to preach about the "erosion of masculinity" and how wives should "submit to their husbands". Yes, this twit was preaching, in the modern era, the paternalistic doctrine so prevalent in the bible of Abraham's days. This "men wear the pants around here" practise does not belong in the era of equality. Surely there ought to be laws against people who advocate sexism. Not to mention laws against evangelists misleading pitifully desperate people who have no self-respect or self-confidence. There should be free psychiatric help for all people in need of "saving", to ensure that they don't waste their money on enriching evangelists.

Those who visited this years MMC, coughed up R100 per person for the "privilege". Considering that about 60 000 men attended, and most of Angus's costs (by his own admission) were covered by religious benefactors, that's a good bit of dosh to be pocketing for a weekend's work. Religion is the world’s best business model. Imagine a business empire where you can sell shares in an imaginary product (salvation), use eternal damnation as your insurance policy/scare tactic/selling point, and make your customers believe that they can expect their dividends to be payed in the afterlife. Ask Angus Buchan; he’s also discovered that religion sells better than potatoes…

The Atheist's Cross to Bear

Following the AvC (Atheism vs Christianity) discussion threads on Google Groups, I am constantly amazed (shocked really) at how weak the arguments are, from the faithful brigade. And yet, they persist with weaker and yet more disingenuous arguments, each time they are shot down by Atheist posts. It's not that hard to visualize them hanging onto a precipice, clutching onto the last few straws in desperation, while we Atheists pull them (the straws) out, one by one. It is pathetic in the extreme. And yet, this penchant to hang onto a discredited ideology, far from indicating a strong sense of perseverance, is an extremely dangerous proclivity.

Believers ask us Atheists why we care so much about their beliefs and faith. As a matter of fact, we are sometimes accused about being more concerned, obsessed even, with religion than they are. It is true we are overly concerned about religion and I've tried several times to come up with a rational reason why this is so. It has finally dawned on me that we are not so much concerned with religion as we are about the well being of the world. Yes, I now finally understand that Atheists are the world's minders. We provide rationality and reason in a religious-mad world; we are the only force left that is preventing these religious nut-jobs from plunging us back into the dark ages. It is entirely possible that if left unchecked they are liable to pre-empt global war to fulfill the "apocalyptic visions as described in Revelations". As fellow Atheist, Psycho Dave (David W Irish) warns us on his blog Fundamentalist Deceit: An American Tradition, the evangelical-dominionist movement is all too real.

As Atheists, we keep the religious crowd, who are potentially fundamentalist, in check. You might say it is our cross to bear. Fellow Atheists, stand up tall and proud everywhere...

The night the world honoured one son of Africa and reminded us of the ignominy of another

Last night, I watched the live broadcast of the 46664 concert from Hyde Park, London; an event staged to both celebrate the forthcoming 90Th birthday of Nelson Mandela (on 18 July 2008) and to help raise funds for HIV AIDS projects. The evening was emotionally charged as artist after artist heaped well deserved praise on Madiba and the 46664 charity, and finally Madiba himself appeared on stage, supported by his wife Graca Machel to remind the world that the work he had started was not finished; he handed over responsibility to all of us with the words " it's in our hands" which is the slogan of the 46664 charity.

On this wonderful day which belonged to Madiba, sadly another gratuitously despicable event was playing itself out in his home continent, Africa, where an election was being shamelessly rigged and stolen. I am referring off course to Robert Mugabe, the tyrant from Zimbabwe who has gone ahead with the run-off elections, after blatantly intimidating his opposition candidate, Morgan Tsvangirai into withdrawing, using violence and other disgraceful tactics. This despotic asshole had the temerity to ignore even Madiba's wishes, and go ahead with his lunatic scheme to cling onto power.

These two events falling on the same day, reminded me of individuals from the government in my own country who are as disgraceful as Robert Mugabe on the one hand, and in total contrast to the ambitions of Madiba, on the other. Yes, you have guessed right. Thabo Mbeki, President of South Africa, whose unforgivable lack of leadership and implicit support for Robert Mugabe has contributed immensely to the dire situation in Zimbabwe, and the Minister of Health, Manto Tshabalala-Msimang, whose stance on HIV AIDS is legendary for its utter stupidity, and the number of lives it has cost.

Africa is in desperate need of leadership, even morality. Oh, Madiba how I wish you were even thirty years younger; then you could have shown these three delinquents the error of their ways...

Bought Gas Lately?

Recently fuel prices have been sky-rocketing in South Africa, with an almost bi-weekly rise. This is not unique to us however, as prices seem to be soaring around the world. I’ve heard complaints from Europe and elsewhere but not too much from Northern America (must be a conspiracy there somewhere, involving G.W. Bush, big business and a certain war on terrorism). It is said that paying for fuel will be damn painful in a few months from now, but until then, happy driving.

Farewell George Carlin, 12 May 1937 - 23 June 2008

Sadly, George Carlin, arguably one of the greatest comedians of all time, has passed on. It was only recently that I called him a "God" and now I wonder if that was maybe an insult to a man who hated the concept. I certainly hope not.

George was regarded as the prototype for Richard Pryor, Cheech and Chong, Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock and Bill Maher. Getting into trouble for pushing the envelope was all in a days work; squashing taboos was just plain enjoyable. Goodbye George, I will always remember you for the following take down of religion, certainly one of the funniest I've heard:

"When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time! But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit! But I want you to know something, this is sincere, I want you to know, when it comes to believing in God, I really tried. I really, really tried. I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up. Something is wrong here. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Scapades. Something is definitely wrong. This is not good work. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Results like these do not belong on the résumé of a Supreme Being. This is the kind of shit you'd expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. And just between you and me, in any decently-run universe, this guy would've been out on his all-powerful ass a long time ago. And by the way, I say "this guy", because I firmly believe, looking at these results, that if there is a God, it has to be a man. No woman could or would ever fuck things up like this. So, if there is a God, I think most reasonable people might agree that he's at least incompetent, and maybe, just maybe, doesn't give a shit. Doesn't give a shit, which I admire in a person, and which would explain a lot of these bad results. So rather than be just another mindless religious robot, mindlessly and aimlessly and blindly believing that all of this is in the hands of some spooky incompetent father figure who doesn't give a shit, I decided to look around for something else to worship. Something I could really count on. And immediately, I thought of the sun. Happened like that. Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. Well, not overnight, you can't see the sun at night. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. Several reasons. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? Unlike some other gods I could mention, I can actually see the sun. I'm big on that. If I can see something, I don't know, it kind of helps the credibility along, you know? So everyday I can see the sun, as it gives me everything I need; heat, light, food, flowers in the park, reflections on the lake, an occasional skin cancer, but hey. At least there are no crucifixions, and we're not setting people on fire simply because they don't agree with us. Sun worship is fairly simple. There's no mystery, no miracles, no pageantry, no one asks for money, there are no songs to learn, and we don't have a special building where we all gather once a week to compare clothing. And the best thing about the sun, it never tells me I'm unworthy. Doesn't tell me I'm a bad person who needs to be saved. Hasn't said an unkind word. Treats me fine. So, I worship the sun. But, I don't pray to the sun. Know why? I wouldn't presume on our friendship. It's not polite. I've often thought people treat God rather rudely, don't you? Asking trillions and trillions of prayers every day. Asking and pleading and begging for favors. Do this, gimme that, I need a new car, I want a better job. And most of this praying takes place on Sunday His day off. It's not nice. And it's no way to treat a friend. But people do pray, and they pray for a lot of
different things, you know, your sister needs an operation on her crotch, your brother was arrested for defecating in a mall. But most of all, you'd really like to fuck that hot little redhead down at the convenience store. You know, the one with the eye-patch and the clubfoot? Can you pray for that? I think you'd have to. And I say, fine. Pray for anything you want. Pray for anything, but what about the Divine Plan? Remember that? The Divine Plan. Long time ago, God made a Divine Plan. Gave it a lot of thought, decided it was a good plan, put it into practice. And for billions and billions of years, the Divine Plan has been doing just fine. Now, you come along, and pray for something. Well suppose the thing you want isn't in God's Divine Plan? What do you want Him to do? Change His plan? Just for you? Doesn't it seem a little arrogant? It's a Divine Plan. What's the use of being God if every run-down schmuck with a two-dollar prayerbook can come along and fuck up Your Plan? And here's something else, another problem you might have: Suppose your prayers aren't answered. What do you say? "Well, it's God's will." "Thy Will Be Done." Fine, but if it's God's will, and He's going to do what He wants to anyway, why the fuck bother praying in the first place? Seems like a big waste of time to me! Couldn't you just skip the praying part and go right to His Will? It's all very confusing. So to get around a lot of this, I decided to worship the sun. But, as I said, I don't pray to the sun. You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Two reasons: First of all, I think he's a good actor, okay? To me, that counts. Second, he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn't fuck around. In fact, Joe Pesci came through on a couple of things that God was having trouble with. For years I asked God to do something about my noisy neighbor with the barking dog, Joe Pesci straightened that cocksucker out with one visit. It's amazing what you can accomplish with a simple baseball bat. So I've been praying to Joe for about a year now. And I noticed something. I noticed that all the prayers I used to offer to God, and all the prayers I now offer to Joe Pesci, are being answered at about the same 50% rate. Half the time I get what I want, half the time I don't. Same as God, 50-50. Same as the four-leaf clover and the horseshoe, the wishing well and the rabbit's foot, same as the Mojo Man, same as the Voodoo Lady who tells you your fortune by squeezing the goat's testicles, it's all the same: 50-50. So just pick your superstition, sit back, make a wish, and enjoy yourself. And for those of you who look to The Bible for moral lessons and literary qualities, I might suggest a couple of other stories for you. You might want to look at the Three Little Pigs, that's a good one. Has a nice happy ending, I'm sure you'll like that. Then there's Little Red Riding Hood, although it does have that X-rated part where the Big Bad Wolf actually eats the grandmother. Which I didn't care for, by the way. And finally, I've always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I like the best? "All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty Dumpty back together again." That's because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None, not one, no God, never was. In fact, I'm gonna put it this way. If there is a God, may he strike this audience dead! See? Nothing happened. Nothing happened? Everybody's okay? All right, tell you what, I'll raise the stakes a little bit. If there is a God, may he strike me dead. See? Nothing happened, oh, wait, I've got a little cramp in my leg. And my balls hurt. Plus, I'm blind. I'm blind, oh, now I'm okay again, must have been Joe Pesci, huh? God Bless Joe Pesci. Thank you all very much. Joe Bless You!"